We lost our baby. I was experiencing some dark spotting which everyone, including the nurse, told me was normal. I just knew that something was wrong, but I kept a positive outlook and pretended everything was okay. When I had bled for the 6th day straight I called the nurse and asked if I could come it. Pat got off work early and met me at the hospital. What was to come was the worst thing I have ever seen. We had an untrasound (very similar to the one we had less than 2 weeks ago) and we saw our baby....just still. Out hearts sank and we just bawled in the office.
It has been a day and it is not getting much easier. We have had an amazing outpour of support and love from our friends and family; for that we are truly blessed and grateful. I am bleeding and have some discomfort in my tummy. I have a pre op appointment tomorrow at 2 PM and have surgery early Friday morning. I am nervous for that but also am anxious to get it over with in a way.
I am so sad, but I know that with all the love and support from my friends, family and especially my amazing husband we will get through this. Everything happens for a reason, but for now I cannot swallow that. I just take every minute at a time and know that there will be a day that I can think of this and not cry. Until then, it helps to think that our baby is in heaven and we will always have a little guardian angel watching over us forever....
All my love,
BC
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